The big sister

We've been home with Mireya for 7 weeks now, and I'll tell you, it's been a whirlwind.  At times, I've felt like the ringleader in a three ring circus.  I've been quite overwhelmed.  Having two really little children is much more challenging than I expected, but just like everything else, you either sink or swim.  I am a swimmer and like anyone else who has ever had two children under two, I have risen to the challenge.  I feel like I am starting to hit my stride and I am no longer afraid to go out with two small children.  This is a good thing, since I am now home alone with both kids.   Full disclosure - most of this post focuses on Hope and not Mireya.

So what's been going on in Hope's life?

One of the coolest things is that we got to visit Fenway this weekend.  We went on the field and Chris got to take batting practice.

Hanging out in the dugout at Fenway

Playing in the stands

Trying on a helmet

Red Sox dugout

In some ways, I feel like my maternity leave ended on Friday when we said goodbye to Hope's daycare.  Today, I started my new job - stay at home mom and primary caregiver to my two beautiful girls.  I viewed this day with trepidation, especially because I started it off with a bang and had to wrangle both girls into Children's for Mireya's cardiology appointment - more on that in my next post.  While I LOVE my double BOB for around town, I don't have a double stroller that is small enough for situations like this.  I'm struggling to find one I like and that is small enough, but that's another topic.  So I end up pushing Hope in our lightweight Maclaren stroller, while wearing Mireya in her ring sling.  It's not ideal, but we make due and it works.     

She doesn't like to have her picture taken

Apple picking / eating at Gramma and Grampa's

Saying goodbye to daycare was harder than I ever thought it would be.  We have been so lucky to find such wonderful women to care for Hope, with the convenience of it being right downstairs from my classroom.  This location was less than convenient for the last 7 weeks, but we made it work. Hope went back to school the week before I did so that I could rest and get some stuff done around the house before going back to work and having a baby, so she was there for a total of 8 weeks. When I found out I was pregnant with Mireya and learned that she was due at the beginning of the school year, I knew I wanted to keep Hope in school for the first weeks of Mireya's life.   But I had also made the decision to stay home for the rest of the school year to care for my kids, so I set late October / early November as her end date.  Due to enrollment, they were only able to offer her a spot until this past Friday.  We thought Mireya would be having surgery in her first few days of life, so I thought this would allow for our time in the hospital.  I thought Mireya would come home a few weeks before Hope finished at day care.  Instead, I got 7 glorious weeks with my newborn, giving me the chance to get to know her while Hope was in school.  I was able to settle right back in to the routine I had with Hope and go to some of my favorite under 1 activities.  It was nice to be able to experience newborn life, since I never did with Hope.  It gave Hope a chance to adjust to being a big sister.  It really worked out much better than I imagined, however now we have to figure out what we're doing with Hope while Mireya is in the hospital for surgery.  Fortunately, it won't be as long of a stay as Hope's.  

my girls

Having her in daycare has been great for all of us.  Each day, Hope looked forward to going there and always lit up when I pulled into the parking lot and got her out, yelling "school!".  Even though the commute took 2 hours of my day (back and forth in the morning and back and forth in the afternoon), I liked being around the school everyday and sometimes seeing my students and coworkers.  When we got there, she'd run down the hallway screaming with glee.  This has always made me so happy.  In fact, most things about her daycare make me happy.  It is easy and convenient, as I don't have to stop somewhere else on my way to / form work.  She has gotten to know some of my coworkers and my students get to interact with her.  At daycare, they feed her breakfast, lunch and snack, so I don't have to worry about packing food for her.  It's reasonably priced compared to other daycare centers.  Her teachers are wonderful and it is clear to me they love her and care for her like she is their own.  She has learned so much and since going back in August, she has had a major language explosion.  She talks all the time and is developmentally ahead in this respect, which is such a beautiful thing given her rough start and increased risk for learning delays.  She has made friends and while she plays well with everyone, she shows preference for these friends, who love her back.  I've loved watching her develop these relationships.  The last few weeks, I have been really sad knowing that she wasn't going to be there anymore.  I've worried endlessly about how she would handle it and if I would be enough for her.  

Hiking in NH.  A girl and her dog.

On Friday, when I went to pick her up, I was feeling somber and could tell the mood amongst her teachers was also somber.  Eventually, as I thanked them for all they have done, I lost it, and so did they.  They assured me everything was going to be great, but they also told me how much they would miss her.  My plan is to take her over there during playground time every few weeks. When I go back to work next fall, she will likely stay at Malden High with me, but she will enter the preschool run by the same program.  Mireya will have her same teachers in infants and toddlers.  They are all looking forward to having her in their class, but sad to lose Hope.  So far, Hope is living up to her name, providing joy, light, and hope in the lives of those she meets.  She is such a blessing and I feel so lucky that she's ours. 

My first day at home with both of them has been pretty smooth.  Hope slept until 6:50, but played in her crib until after 8, allowing me to snooze a little longer and get a shower.  I was able to get her breakfast out and ready before getting her up and then we ate breakfast together before I got Mireya up.  I fed Mireya, we walked the dog, then we headed into Children's.  Hope was a gem during Mireya's appointment, even though it was a little later than I would have liked given nap time.  After the appointment, we went down to the cafeteria for lunch, where she ate her whole grilled cheese sandwich without  a fuss.  Then I took her out to the Prouty Garden to play for a bit, which she loved.  By the time we got home, it was almost 2.  I put her right down for a nap, but she played in her crib until close to 3, and she's still sleeping now at 5.  I know I'm foolish to hope every day be like today, but if it is, this won't be bad at all.  By the time she gets up, we'll walk the dog and it will be almost time for dinner.  In some ways, saying goodbye to daycare makes my life a little less hectic because I don't have to schedule the day around drop off and pick up.  When she wakes from her nap, she will be content to play in her crib while I finish up whatever I happen to be doing at the moment.  I found afternoons after day care pick up to be challenging.  I'm curious to see what afternoons look like now that we're all home.  In some ways, I'm thinking they might be smoother.

Hanging out in Prouty Garden while we still can

Prouty

She's getting so big

After an initial meltdown, Hope has adjusted incredibly well to being a big sister.   She was excited to meet Mireya in the hospital until the day we told her that her sister was coming home.  Both Chris and I watched her process this information, to which the reaction was less than pretty.  She told us "All done.  Out."  Then she proceeded to attach herself to me.  We went back to the NICU waiting room so my parents could visit before we went to dinner.  She passed out on the bench.  This is something she never does.  Then at dinner she wouldn't look at anyone, wouldn't talk to anyone, and wouldn't eat.  She sat on my lap facing in and looking completely distrught.   I didn't realize that a toddler could experience emotion this deep or for this long.  Anyway, by the next day, she recovered and by the time I brought her home from daycare, she was all smiles and excited to see her sister.  She's been nothing but accepting ever since.  She does love a little hard at times.  She acts  all sweet and gentle, then wacks Mireya on the head.  But she is always excited to see her little sister when they've been apart.  We've had some challenges, but many of these challenges are just as related to her being two.

Sleeping in the NICU waiting room

Not happy 

Me and my girls

Holding Mireya for the first time

Best friends already

Sunday sillies

Hope celebrated her second birthday last week.  She learned how to sing Happy Birthday, which is adorable.  We started her birthday weekend with a park playdate with her friends from baby group.  On Sunday we went pumpkin picking and went out for a hike.  Chris' parents came for dinner in the evening.  On her actual birthday, we went to the dog park after daycare and ordered pizza (her requested food for dinner).  We FaceTimed with Chris' parents, my parents and my Aunt and Uncle.  She was much happier than she was on her first birthday when she was coming down with a virus that ultimately landed her in the hospital.  

Playdate at Parallel Park

Pumpkin picking

Hiking at Great Brook

Birthday cupcakes

the gifts

dog park selfie

Her shirt says it all

opening her gifts

Add caption

Her first bike

I will be updating on Mireya's health and how its been going with her in my next post, which hopefully I will get written either tonight or tomorrow.  This will be a much longer post as it has been a while and there is so much to update on.  Overall, things are going about as expected.  I am tired, overwhelmed at times, but so unbelievably happy.  These past few weeks have made me realize how beyond blessed we are to have been entrusted with raising these two beautiful warriors. 

Mama's first 5k after Mireya - the Heart Warrior 5k to raise money for Children's

Heart Warrior

Helmet selfie.  First bike ride

She loves it!

First haircut

Again, she hates having her picture taken....lol