New York, New York

It's been a busy fall, and I'm pleased to say marathon number 23 is in the books, and while it was not my fastest time, it was one of my more special marathons.  This has been a grueling fall starting with our big move 4 days after school started, and followed by Reach the Beach, two out of town weddings, and a marathon.  The New York Marathon was a culmination of this extremely busy season.

Believe it or not, after 22 marathons, I had not run one of the most famous - The New York Marathon.  I put my name in the lottery a few times, but didn't get in.  I decided I wanted to do it right, so I would do it when I turned 40.  I decided to run for Children's because not only is it a cause that is dear to my family, but it would guarantee me entry to the marathon.  It was only a $3000 fundraising minimum, but I knew I wanted to raise more so I set my original goal at $6000.  I applied in late January and found out I was in in early March.  I booked a hotel when I applied in January and started to make plans.  I kicked off my fundraising the day Reya had her third open heart surgery, which put a huge dent in my minimum goal.  Then Boston happened.  The weather was AWFUL.   Sitting on the bus to go out to Hopkinton, I learned that I had hit the minimum goal of $3000, 7 months before I was required to.  Like I said, the weather was awful, so I am glad I signed up and raised that much money so early on.  I don't know I would have actually done a marathon this fall if I hadn't already been signed up for New York.

I was pretty burnt out and turned off going into New York, but this one is special to me and I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't disappointed that I didn't feel great through most of the day.  Going into a training cycle burnt out makes for a very loooong season.  My heart was in it when training begun in early July, but that quickly faded as we dealt with all that life threw at us. First, we had to say good-bye to Sanders, then we bought a house and had to pack 13 years of belongings in just over 5 weeks, while also getting ready to sell the house in Arlington.  Then we had to unpack all of those belongings, while still getting ready to sell our first home.  Then there was the laundry debacle - where we didn't have a washer / dryer for the first month and we had to go to Arlington to do wash (with two small kids).  The whole experience was intense and draining.  Finding time to run once school begun was almost impossible.  In the first few weeks, I was able to find a little time before picking the kids up.  I also did a lot of runs pushing them.  I had to learn all new places to run.

First race in our new town

I found myself even squeezing long runs in.  There were a couple of Fridays where I headed out after work, including the weekend we headed to New York City for our friends Ryan and Sabrina's wedding.   It was crazy - I raced home, dropped the kids off with Robbie and Tiana, ran 20 miles, showered and jumped in the car.  My weekly mileage never really got up to where I needed it to be, and my speed just kind of plateaued, maybe even went in the opposite direction of what I desired.  It was clear to me that I wasn't going to break any records at New York, and really, I was ok with that.  I had never planned to run it for time.  I wanted to enjoy every minute and come across with a smile on my face.

Training run in Central Park after a fun wedding weekend

However, despite this burn-out, as race weekend approached, I found myself getting pretty excited.   I was looking forward to the weekend away, alone in the city.  I rarely get true alone time, and I've never been alone that long in New York City.   Friday of race weekend, I ended up taking a sick day to take Reya to see her Otolaryngologist because she had lost her voice after her vocal cord procedure.  It was nice to have the day off to finish packing and to do some housework.   Chris got home around 4:30, I handed the kids off to him and drove down to the train station.  It was raining and traffic was bad.  I ended up making it just in the nick of time.  The train ride was very enjoyable and I was so excited when I arrived, I couldn't stop smiling.

I checked into my hotel on 37th St in the Garment District.   The room was reasonably spacious for New York.   After checking in and unpacking a bit, I decided to go out for a walk.  Unfortunately, I had to cut it short because it started pouring.  So I came back to the hotel and relaxed a bit.  I wrote names of all those who had donated on my singlet, which was such a therapeutic thing to do.

Saturday morning I slept until 7.  I headed out around 8 to get a coffee and see if I could find the muffins I had planned to eat on race day and forgot at home.  At 9, I was meeting the Children's team for a shake-out run and breakfast.    I did not find the muffins, but the run and breakfast were great. 

I made it to the expo

Finding my name at the expo

From there I walked over to the expo and walked around there for an hour or two before coming back to the hotel to eat some lunch and relax before meeting up mid-afternoon with Ryan and Sabrina. 

Flat Molly

We met up around the corner from my hotel and this cute little Italian trattoria and chatted for a couple hours.  From there, I jumped on the subway and met up with some of my Somerville tribe - Urvi and Jesse, and Amie and Ryan.  On the way there, I happened upon a natural foods store and they had my muffins!  I enjoyed my walk to the restaurant, checking out a part of the city I hadn't really visited.   We had a lovely dinner.  On the way back to the hotel, I stopped in Times Square to look at the lights.  In the subway station a crowd had formed around a band.  I listened for a while before heading above ground.  I stopped and picked up a coffee for the next morning since Starbucks didn't open until 6 and I would be on the bus by then. I was too excited to sleep, so I spent the time compiling names of the various heart warriors I planned on running for.

Impromtu concert in the Subway at Times Square

The night before in Times Square (using the new portrait mode on my phone)

I finally fell asleep, but woke up a lot, afraid the my clocks weren't right and that I was going to miss the bus.  Daylight savings time was ending and I didn't have a single clock in my room I could adjust manually.  I was finally up for good around 4:30.  I ate some oatmeal (my hotel room had a microwave!) and sipped my coffee (again, microwave!) and putzed around making sure I had everything together before calling a lyft and heading to Central Park South where I was to get on the bus.  The ride over was less than 10 minutes and the bus was easy to find.  The Lyft driver seemed clueless that the marathon was even happening or even the scale of the marathon.  I was pretty early to the bus, so I got a front seat and we took off right on time.   It was a long drive out to Staten Island, with a lot of traffic.  We drove through Times Square and then out along the East River, passing the Brooklyn Bridge.  We took a tunnel into Brooklyn and then went over the Verrazano, which I would run over a few hours later.

Times square from the bus

Brooklyn Bridge from the bus

Made it to Staten Island

When we got there, we headed over to the charity village.   The bus and the charity village are huge perks.   The bus was comfortable and not crowded and the village was away from all the madness.  We had our own heated tent in the village, which didn't matter that much since the weather was pretty nice.  The tent had coffee and then there was a charity village food area.  We had our own bathrooms in the charity village.  They still had lines, but the lines weren't too bad.   We took a team picture and just kind of hung out and waited.

Around 9:35, I headed over to my corral.  I was one of the first ones there, so I was able to get right into a portapotty inside the corrals with no line.  I got myself to the front of my corral and waited.   

In my corral

Wave 1 went off and we moved up to the start which was at the base of the Verazano Narrows Bridge.  It was pretty cool waiting there.  Then it was time to go!  A cannon signaled the start of our wave.   I was in the orange wave, but because of positioning the blue wave started running before us so we watched them run towards the bridge, then we took off to Frank Sinatra's New York, New York.  Going over this bridge is one of my favorite starts of any of the marathons I've done.  It's a huge hill, but I didn't even notice we were on a hill.  The orange wave went over the top deck.  We were on the left side of the bridge so we could see the skyline.  Everyone was taking selfies.    It was so beautiful and so exciting.  There was a fire boat spraying water down in the river below and a helicopter hovering over us.  At one point, the helicopter flew next to the bridge right at our level.  The helicopter door was open and I could see the guy's face.  He saluted us.  It was so cool.

On the bridge

Brooklyn
The bridge takes up the first 2 miles.  It was so fast.  Then we headed down into Brooklyn.  Brooklyn was amazing and the crowds were awesome.  I was having so much fun but managing not to go too fast.  Around 4 or 5, I started to not feel as good.  My ankle felt a little funny and I felt a little lightheaded and nauseous.  I focused on the crowds and my music and muddled through.  It was a little warmer than I thought it would feel.    I took lots of water, when I could - the water stations were a little crowded and in my opinion, there were not enough tables.  At mile 8, all three waves funnel into 1.  It got so crowded.   A one point, the spectators had crowded the street, a la Tour de France, and runners were getting by in about 3 or 4s.  We actually had to stop and walk.  It was insane.  Around mile 9, we ran through a Hasidic Jewish community.  They are not permitted to cheer, so it was very quiet.  I found it fascinating and that mile or so passed pretty quickly.  However, I still wasn't feeling great, so just before the half, I pulled over to use the portapotty, thinking that if I stopped to pee it might make me feel better.   I think it would have helped, but then we went over a bridge to head into Queens and so many people slowed down or started to walk that I couldn't get my pace going.  I was relieved to be half way done.

Queens
I don't remember much about Queens.  We weren't there for too long.  I kind of just slogged along.  It was quieter than Brooklyn.   Next stop - Queensboro Bridge.  This was my least favorite part of the course.  It was dead quiet here, which in some ways was welcome after 15 miles of madness.  I didn't feel great and I couldn't get any rhythm going because once again people had slowed or were walking as we climbed the bridge.  Like much of the course since all three waves had come together, I felt like I was wasting a lot of energy bobbing and weaving.  I couldn't believe that this was something I had to do.  I had seeded myself as a 3:50 runner, but was planning on running 4:15.  People should have been passing me.  Anyway, I was a little annoyed, but it came to my mind that mile 16 was for a heart family who had lost a child to CHD, but also had a second child with CHD and adopted three more warriors.  They got me over that bridge. 

Manhattan
The Queensboro Bridge dumps you onto First Ave.  It is a wall of noise.  At one point I counted and counted it to be 11 deep.  As I came down around off the bridge, I was looking for Chris' cousin, Emily, who was out on the course cheering for her husband Joaquin.  Somehow we missed each other.  I continued down 1st Ave.  I was still not feeling very great, but just kept trucking.  We came in at 64th or so and I knew I had friends at 100th, mile 18.  So I clung to the left side, where I knew they would be.  It was hard to be on the left side because it felt like everyone was clinging to the sides.  Every so often someone would spot their loved one and stop dead in front of you.   Urvi and Jesse ended up being a little earlier than I expected, so I was already passing them when I heard them cheer for me.  After I passed them, I moved over to the center. The running was a little easier in the middle.  Mile 19 was when I started to run for warriors I knew that are all doing so well.  These are the children of some extraordinary heart moms I have become friends with over the past few years.  Over the next 7 miles, I was channeling their energy, thinking about the battle each of their families has fought.   Mile 19 was for Tyler and Will - two awesome no-longer-little boys, both of their moms' have been such an inspiration to me.  Tyler heads to the cath lab this week.  Mile 20 was for Marlee, who is the same age as Reya.  Mile 21 was for Devynn, a 9 year old girl who had the room next to us on the CICU this past April.  We ended up recovering on the floor at the same time and their story helped get me through some tough times in recovery.  Mile 22 was for Dana and her family.  Dana is my age and a warrior herself.  Both she and her brother have the same CHD as Hope, as do two of her children.  Her third child has Downs' syndrome and I have learned so much from this family.  True warriors.  Mile 23 was for Gabe, Reya's "twin".  Of all my heart mom friends, I had been able to connect most with Melissa as Gabe is just a few months ahead of Reya and anatomically very similar.  Our kids have been on the roller coaster together.  Miles 24 and 25 were for Mireya and Hope.  Running for these families really kept me going.

One of my favorite heart warrior quotes, fittingly appropriate in a marathon

The Bronx
At 19.5, we headed over another bridge, the Willis Avenue Bridge, into the Bronx.  As I turned onto the bridge, I received a text from my friend Kimi, who was following along at home, welcoming me to the Bronx.  I was really struggling and getting that text really lifted my spirits and made me smile.  I dug deep and pushed through the Bronx, willing myself forward back to Manhattan.  The Bronx is the shortest section, only about a mile and a half, then you're back in Manhattan on the home stretch.  That mile and a half is a blur.  I remember a Biofreeze station - an ointment to help with pain.  I had never seen this before in a marathon.  I contemplated stopping but I didn't think I was in enough pain and I really didn't think it would help me.  Then there was a water stop - I was stopping at pretty much every one by now.  I felt thirsty from the moment I woke up on marathon day.  I thought maybe it was nerves, but it never went away.  I took in a lot of fluids through the race and my thought is that maybe I didn't take on enough salt to balance those fluids.   It was warmer than I expected and really wish I had chosen shorts over capris.  The only other thing I remember in the Bronx was a band of drummers banging on buckets.

Back to Manhattan - the final stretch
We finally made the turn to go over the bridge back to Manhattan.  I barely remember this bridge.  I was really struggling at this point.   I think I walked over this bridge.  I was feeling really awful.  My heart was racing.  I tried to walk to slow it down and it wouldn't slow.  I felt light headed and even though I was only a few miles away, I was really afraid I wouldn't finish.  Considering my cause, not finishing didn't feel like an option, so I dug deep again.  Starting at mile 22, I walked a lot.  At this point we were in Harlem.  There were all kinds of bands and entertainment set up and I wish I had felt better so that I could've enjoyed them.  It was really festive and people around me seemed to be having a good time.  I was just focusing on staying upright.  I've never felt quite like this.  But I took it easy, and pushed forward.  I knew Urvi and Jesse were at mile 23, so I just tried to focus on getting to them.  Somewhere within the 22nd mile, I passed a med tent.  They were handing out salt packets.  I thought to myself - it can't hurt, so I took one.  It was pretty gross and it was another few minutes before I got to a water station to wash it down.  I continued to walk, my heart still racing, fighting nausea.  I felt like I was one of the only people walking.  As I was walking, I was passed by a group of three runners.  It was an Achilles runner and his two guides.  The Achilles organization is amazing - it supports runners with disabilities.  So I was really surprised when the guide closest to me pushed me rudely and said "excuse me, get out of the way."   The Achilles runner was able bodied and looked really strong, and at this point there was plenty of space, so the guides could have gone around me.  I was shocked by the guides' apparent assumption that they had the right of way to the entire course.   She pushed me so hard that I collided with a runner on my other side, who pushed me back and also rudely said ''excuse me''.  As I was pushed, both times, it was really a concerted effort to stay on my feet.  I was worried if I went down, I wouldn't get back up.  That push could have ended my race.   Miraculously, I didn't go down.  I was a little bit mad, but didn't have the energy to be more than a little mad, so I pushed forward, trying to get to Urvi and Jesse.  Shortly after this incident, I finally saw them, like a mirage ahead of me, just a little before we entered the park.  I pulled over to talk to them.  I had a little over 2 miles to go and I wasn't sure I was going to finish.  I told them how bad I felt, and they encouraged me, telling me the worst was over.  I thanked them and said good-bye.  Seeing them lifted my spirits so much.

Central Park
Other than the Verrazano, this was my favorite part of the marathon.  Shortly after I entered the park around mile 24, I realized this mile was for Reya.  There was a cool, gentle breeze.  It felt like my feet grew wings.  I finally had my heart rate under control, or maybe I just wasn't noticing it anymore.  Through this mile, I thought about everything Reya has gone through and everything we have gone through to get her where she is today.  The pain just disappeared as I thought of the pain and discomfort that she has endured.  At this point, the course is rolling hills and it was so fun to wind through the Park.  I started passing people left and right, including the group who had pushed me earlier.   

Mile 25
As I passed the mile 25 marker, I filled up with tears.  This mile was for Hope.  For the little girl who started my quest for this cause, who made me a mama, for the little girl who has been so brave and so strong over the past 4 years.  While she doesn't remember the physical pain, the emotional weight she carries is more than most adults.  She understands and knows about things no little girl should know about.  Thoughts of her carried me along the perimeter of Central Park South and into Washington Circle, back into the park.

Mile 26
Because it was not a full mile, I did not dedicate it to anyone in particular, but instead to all of the warriors at Boston Children's, the culmination of these last 7 months as I carried the honor of wearing the checkered Children's singlet.  At this point, I was flying towards the finish and finally having so much fun, but I still just wanted to be done.  I kept searching on the horizon, around every bend for that glorious finish line.  Unlike Boylston St in Boston, where you can see the finish for the whole .2, the finish at New York was hidden around a bend, up a small hill.   Finally I spotted it - a glorious sight in a race that it was never guaranteed that I finish.    I raced towards it, enjoying the crowds.  I realized I had seconds to break 4:15, and since that was my goal time, I wanted to be just under.  I crossed the line in 4:15:47. 

Sweet, but painful, Victory
As we came across the finish, I recognized Peter Ciaccia, the long time director of the New York Marathon, who is retiring this year.  He was shaking finishers' hands, so I made sure to shake his hand and thank him for all he has done.   Then I promptly pulled out my phone and took a selfie with the finish behind me. 

Finished!

I walked a little further and grabbed my medal.  Another selfie :)   

Got my medal!

Then I proceeded into the chute.  It took a while to get water.  I was so thirsty so this was disappointing.  We didn't get any water until we got to the food bags, but when we got there, there were a bunch of empty tables.  There were volunteers standing in front of them not doing anything, so we finally asked a volunteer to get some of the bags out.  Another volunteer yelled as us to go further down the road to get a bag down there.  There was a huge clump of runners and seemingly not enough volunteers for that clump.  I finally got my bag and dug out the gatorade in the bag.  Orange.  I don't care for orange, but I chugged half of it anyway.  I knew I needed the electrolytes.  Then I pulled out the protein shake.  It was awful, but I drank it anyway because I knew my body needed fuel.   I didn't much feel like eating the food in the bag, most of it was glutenous and my stomach was pretty queasy.  So I kept walking.  People were moving soooo slowly.  I just wanted to get out of there, but it was packed and I felt trapped.  I needed a bathroom bad, but there were none readily available.  I asked a volunteer, he said up by the exit.   We went up a hill and finally got our ponchos.  Again, there were volunteers just standing around and others with huge clumps of runners in front of them.  When asked, they said that they had to save those ponchos for wave 3....which seemed crazy to me.  Why not just have all the volunteers handing out all the ponchos at all times?  At New York, you can choose to check a bag or choose a poncho.  To get the bag, you have to walk even further.  The poncho is actually really nice - it is fleece lined and water repellent.  I was getting cold, so this was nice to snuggle into.  I finally spotted a portapotty - relief.  I hobbled over there.  I finally was getting some energy back so I started texting my loved ones.      Next stop - hobble back to the hotel.  There was no subway nearby and no easy way to get a cab or uber, so I walked the 2 miles back.  It was miserable, but lots of other runners were doing it.  I was hoping to pass a McDonalds so I could get some fries, but I didn't really pass anything where I could get something quick and to go.  I finally got to my hotel.  I didn't have a ton of time, so I quickly showered - as quick as you can post marathon, got dressed, packed the rest of my stuff, then headed down to check out and head off to my train.  Since Daylight Savings time had ended, it was already getting dark.   My hotel was only a few blocks from Penn Station.  I had every intention of sitting at a bar near the station to wait for my train, but didn't really have the energy, so I grabbed something to eat, bought some ibuprofen, and found a red cap to help me get on the train when it arrived.  While I waited, I chatted with another finisher waiting for a train.   The red cap service is great - they take your bags for you and get you down on the train before everyone else.  This means you have your pick of seats and can settle in before everyone else gets on.      I chose a window seat on the right side.

It was a long ride home.  My feet hurt and my muscles were seizing.  In New Haven, my seat -mate moved back a row, so I was able to stretch out.   It was a very unproductive ride.  I had no energy to do anything but look at Facebook.   We had a slight delay, and finally pulled into the station around 9:45.  I was home by 10:15 and in bed by 10:30 since I had to get up and go to work the next day.

I don't know if I'll want to run it again, but the New York Marathon was a great experience.   Boston and Philly are still my favorites.  No, it was not my day, but I had the energy from all of those who donated to my run and from all of those I was running for to get me through the tough spots, of which there were too many.   I channeled that every opportunity I got and I truly think I would not have finished without it.  I had one goal for this race - to smile through the whole race and to finish with a smile.   Even though my body didn't cooperate and the day was hard, in every picture I see I have a giant smile plastered on my face, so mission accomplished.  Running for Children's was so meaningful to me.  Boston Children's is a second home to us and to be able to raise almost $10,000 is amazing.  I had set the bar high.  When I set that goal, I thought it was unimaginable that I would make it, but with all of your help, I am almost there.

Now, I rest.  I am taking next season off and will reevaluate come June as to whether I would like to run a fall marathon.  If I do, it will be Philly.  For now, I'd like to work on getting my speed back up and run a few spring half marathons.  I'm looking forward to the opportunity to explore the trails that Bedford has to offer, perhaps even getting lost from time to time, without the pressure of running a certain distance.  Most of all, I'm looking forward to running just for the love of running.